Losing my religion

In American Society, racism is a taboo subject. And in the church, it's even more taboo. But it was real. Very real. I experienced it firsthand. I remember the leader of my church (the pastor's wife) coming into my apartment (actually I was staying with two sisters in the church in a two-bedroom apartment) and blasting my roommate for having all "Afro-centric" decor. "You've got to get rid of this," She said with disgust, flailing her hands in dismay at the Kemetian (Egyptian) paintings on the wall she'd gotten at a Harlem festival. She said the "ethnic decor" was not conducive to evangelizing different kinds of people, that they would be somehow pushed away by my roommate celebrating her own culture. No "universal appeal"  our leader said, aggravated, her blue eyes flaming. It was weird at the time, but it was understood amongst my household that this woman was not "white" but our leader-the leader who God had appoint

Throughout my post-church experiences, there is something I have realized. Religion is not about a particular church. It's not Christianity, Judaism, Islam or any other. In my Christian church days, I learned many valuable lessons through all the painful experiences. One of those lessons was about what actually constitutes a religion. After I left religion and entered the "secular" world, the contrast became more clear. In other words, I thought that I left religion behind when I left religion behind-if you get what I'm saying. But religion is not about church. In fact: Everything in our society is a religion! Our western American culture is a religion. So is our obsession with Hollywood and it's celebrities. And Sports. And politics....after all, the root word in culture is "cult"... See, religion is not about Jesus or Muhammad, Krishna or Yahweh. Religion is a paradigm, a social construct that is rigid and dense. It limits you. And confi

Since I first started this blog back in 2011, I have gone through many changes. Really that's an understatement. With each blog, readers can see my journey, my own evolution. The question then becomes, evolution towards what? Good point. Today I conclude that what we call spirituality- a word so casually tossed  across the board- is perfectly individual. This is not a new concept, I realize this. But common sense is not always common. What we believe-from our perception of God, church, politics, education, etc.- was never meant to be a collective experience. That's why people experience so much conflict when other people are sharing their opinions on a subject. On You tube, you have millions of people commenting all sorts of things in protest of what someone else has to say. Others are having conversations and are getting caught up in disagreements because the other person thinks differently than they do.... Here's my new question: Why does it matter that others t

Can we grant ourselves permission to just be ? Do we have to....well, is anything a 'have-to'? From the cradle, we have been told a resounding 'YES!' But is that true? When I talk about permission with others, even spiritual people have considerable trouble grasping this.  It's assumed we have permission from ourselves to be ourselves. But is that true? Almost everything is what we 'have to' or 'should do', isn't it? Go to school, get married, buy a house, have 2.5 children, work 40 hours a week,  go to church, run around being 'busy'........ Such pressure is often invisible to the naked eye. But it's there. You can feel it. And I can feel it, too. These energies manifest as disapproval or rejection. As marginalization or exclusion from a group, an opportunity or a relationship. Truthfully, we are so indoctrinated with external values and ideas that it has become a part of us. We are running a program and we don

I have a new perspective on prayer these days. Here's what I think is a powerful quote on the reality of prayer: "... when we pray to God, it's not the entity "God" that answers prayers, it's that we are harnessing the inherent power/frequency of that word which has the ultimate power to transform, transcend, heal and create. This accounts for the reason so many people in so many different religions experience a profound transformation when they pray or practice faith. They are all tapping into the same frequency that can transcend the perceived limits of this physical world. This is what we call "God Frequency ." Many times people don't think of God like that. To many, God is a guy on the throne in the sky looking down- sort of like a genie who is deciding to grant our wishes-or not. We think if we're a good-enough court jester, God will crack a smile and wave his magic wand on our behalf. Others will say that they don't think o

I joined a group several months ago. It's a spiritual group. For anyone who's been following my blog for a while, you may be holding your breath at this very moment....but it wasn't like that at all. The woman who started the club invited me to join, and we had an instant connection.... Nevertheless, I was hesitant. But this woman was very comforting and she really helped me in my moment of need with her kind words, so I was more open to hearing about this group she had going. I'd been on my own spiritual journey for a while and was deeply desiring meaningful relationships again. If you check out the archives from last year, I wrote a blog on friendship and the experience of being all alone. When I walked away from my religion, I also walked away from the relationships formed inside of that religion. It was very traumatic losing everything I'd ever known, though I knew it was the right thing for me to do. So here I was, deciding whether to join this group-an