When Your Son or Daughter is Trapped in the ICOC or ICC

 The ICOC and ICC psychologically KIPDNAP young people.

The International Churches of Christ [ICOC] and the International Christian Church [ICC] psychologically kidnap college students. On college and university campuses across the United States, Australia, Europe, Canada, South America and other countries around the globe, the ICOC and ICC target college students. The goal is to "share their faith" with them. This is supposed to be, on the surface, a "normal" Christian form of faith-based outreach. 

But it is not. The ICOC and ICC are bible-based Christian CULTS. These groups are "movements" originally launched by Chuck Lucas back in the 1970's out of Florida, what was known as the "Crossroads Church of Christ" movement. 

What became the Boston movement in the late 1970s was started by Lucas' protege' Thomas "Kip" Mckean II. Kip had taken over Chuck's position as cult leader and had accelerated the young charismatic group of zealous Floridian college students to new heights. He launched what became known as the Boston Movement out of Lexington, Massachusetts [and subsequently, Boston] during that time period of late '70s, early 1980s. The Boston Movement "took over" existing Crossroads churches [Mainline Churches of Christ/COC] congregations in various cities and states throughout the country and Kip sent mission teams to plant churches in other countries, which ultimately became known as the International Churches of Christ, or ICOC. 

In 2006, after decades of corruption and harm done across the world in Jesus' name, Kip had officially been ousted from his own ICOC "discipling" movement. He then hit the reset button, starting his current cult, the International Christian Church [ICC] based out of Portland, Oregon - the exact same origin story as the ICOC's headquarters out of Boston, Massachusetts decades earlier. 

There is much detail that is left out, but this is not about the history of the ICOC and ICC. I just wanted to give you the abridged version "cliff notes" of how these predatory cults came to be. 

When you send your son or daughter away to college, or they still live at home and are starting college for the very first time, there are so many ways you prepare. I'll never forget my mom taking me shopping at Bed, Bath & Beyond for college dorm room supplies. [I was going away to school]. There is alot to think about and a long to-do list when a child is going to college. There's also the emotional aspect of being an empty nester if the children are moving away to school and you're now living alone. Not to mention the transition of children growing up and becoming young adults. This all varies across the spectrum with different people. But generally, it can be a bundle of mixed emotions.

One thing parents and teenage children alike do not think of is the danger of cults on campus. No one is prepared for predatory groups targeting college students in this most vulnerable time of their lives. When you're away from home and from family, a student is easy prey for groups like the ICOC and ICC. 

How would I know? Because I was, many years ago, one of those students. 

The ICOC got me as a college freshman at age 18. I had no idea that Christian cults were a thing and a simple invitation to a Sunday service would be the start of what would become over a decade-long cult entanglement. 

Your son or daughter is on campus, trying to figure out what major they want, what social circles they fit in with, and who they are - who they want to become. No one talks about the mental health challenges that comes with being a college student. Even under the best of circumstances, the transition from high school to college isn't easy. It is a big deal. And it can be hard, confusing, lonely, and stressful. 

My first semester at college was somewhat traumatic for various reasons. One reason was a toxic roommate. Colleges do a random lottery where they pair you with a perfect stranger to share a small space with. You literally go from living with your parents [and in better circumstances, you have your own room]. You go from that to literally sharing a room with a stranger. It's a crap shoot regarding who you get for a roommate. 

There's peer pressure to do everything from drugs to sex to committing felonies. Then there's the stress of a packed schedule of full time courses. So many adjustments and, depending on what other challenges the young person has coming in, it can feel overwhelming, 

I'm saying this to say that the ICOC and ICC target your son or daughter while going through this major life phase transition. It doesn't matter if your home was a good, supportive one or you were a horrible parent. Transition makes a person vulnerable in a way nothing else does. Even the perfect upbringing doesn't matter because now the young person is in a new environment in a new phase of life. The challenges are the same regardless of how you grew up. Regardless if the young person is a student commuting locally to a community college, a private school, or are away from home at a school in a different city, state, or even country, the ICOC and ICC are present and looking for new recruits.

The ICOC and ICC "psychologically kidnap" college students [what they call, "sharing their faith" ] in the following ways:

1. Cold contact proselytizing. ICOC or ICC members recruit by walking up to random students on campus and inviting them to church or to a campus bible group study [i.e. bible talk]. They will hand out printed flyers or offer verbal invitations. It isn't unusual for ICOC or ICC members to invite strangers right before bible talk to hopefully get them to join spontaneously - so the student doesn't have time to change their mind. In this phase of development, young people are often spontaneous in this way. Joining in on something is a common "hey, sure, why not?" kind of thing when you're young and in college.

2.  Relationship building. The ICOC or ICC member slowly develops a relationship with the young person and at some point, when the moment is right, they "share their faith". This relationship dynamic can be a college roommate, a fellow student, an authority figure, or close friend. I was recruited by my college math tutor. She was a graduate student who tutored math in the program I was part of. 

3. Fliers may be posted up around campus for ICOC or ICC Christian events. Keep in mind, there are many Christian groups on campus. So a flyer for a bible discussion group every Friday at noon, for example, is not unusual. 

4. "Fun" events. The ICOC and ICC disguise recruitment behind extra-curricular events that are non-religious sounding. Typical examples are pizza and a movie nights, video games, or bowling. Young people desire friends, and this tactic is a trap to get those students seeking relationships and social interaction - and students just looking for a break from the stress of studying, exams, and papers. 

These kinds of tactics can innocuously trap young people. It's a slow burn. The person you love doesn't realize that this is a cult and they need to get away. They probably feel something is "off" but they don't know what it is. Since there's no information on cults to support what they are intuitively sensing, they often gaslight themselves into ignoring the red flags.

And before you know it, they're psychologically kidnapped. 

Like all cults, the ICOC and ICC move fast when it comes to the indoctrination process. They both have a series of bible studies called "First Principles" written by Kip Mckean to indoctrinate, brainwash, and trap young peoples' minds using the bible and basic Christian principles. 

I did another post on how these bible studies work here, so to get a full understanding, check it out.

Ideally, if you can intervene before your loved one gets too far along in the first principles studies, that is the only chance you can save them. Once they're too far in, I'm sorry to tell you, but it's too late. 

Once cult indoctrination is anchored in the brain, you cannot just talk them out of it. Telling them, "It's a cult!" or "I'm worried about you" is the worst thing you can do. The ICOC and ICC instill in the young person's mind what to expect when it comes to outside criticism. They are mentally inoculated from logical reasoning. There is an entire First Principles study on Persecution alone. Your son or daughter [niece, nephew, etc] now sees any outside information as an attack from Satan to prevent them from getting "in the light" with God. The ICOC and ICC uses intense fear mongering to implant the trauma-based programming to make the young person doubtful of their own spirituality apart from the guidance of the ICOC and ICC. If your son or daughter was raised in church and/or was baptized as a Christian, the ICOC/ICC will convince them that this doesn't count. ONLY THEY have the answer and the key to truly following God and being saved. In fact, they indoctrinate people that ONLY THE ICOC or ICC is "right with God" and that no one outside of the group is saved and going to heaven. 

Once the student has crossed that threshold [which differs for everyone], you cannot talk them out of it. At that age, most young people are not spending most of their time with their parent and family members. Those who do typically don't get kidnapped. But the ICOC/ICC love bombs your loved one using gifts, quality time hanging out, and friendship to open them up to doing more bible studies and getting baptized into the church. As per my own first hand experience, you spend more and more time with the ICOC/ICC and less and less time with outsiders. And this quickly becomes a trap. One day you look up and all your relationships are primarily ICOC or ICC members. This further isolates the person from outside influence. 

The next thing you know, even if your son or daughter lives at home as they commute to college, he or she will be pressured to move out into what they call a "kingdom household", which is a living arrangement with other same gender single ICOC members. Or a female member/recruit will be asked to move in with a married couple - usually to be a de-facto unpaid nanny for their children. She will probably be sleeping on their couch and struggling to support herself while paying them rent. These kinds of "household" scenarios occur after they get baptized but can occur right before baptism. The church has convinced your loved one that you and the other family members are the enemy who threaten their relationship with God and their salvation. In their distorted minds, you are a danger in this way and they will distance themselves from you to protect themselves. To make matters worse, the church assigns them a "discipler" which is supposed to be a spiritual mentor, but really acts as a handler to keep them in line and as a probation officer who they have to meet with once a week to "get advice" and help them "grow spiritually". 

All of these factors working together add up to being kidnapped psychologically. Once this happens, what do you do? 

As a parent, the pain of losing your child must be excruciating. The sense of powerlessness is intense. How do these strangers come into my loved one's life and turn them against us? 

That is what cults are and this is what they do. They target and recruit vulnerable people. Brainwashing is very real. And remember, no one warned us about cults on campus. So they were sitting ducks. 

What do you DO to save your child?

Once mind control has been established [also called thought reform], all you can do is your best to stay sane and supportive. Some families with the financial means pay for a high end intervention by an exit counselor [i.e. Steve Hassan] to deprogram the person. For the rest of us, all I can offer are the following suggestions:

1. Don't say anything negative to them about the ICOC or ICC. This is painful, but it will only drive the person further into the thorny arms of the church. 

2. Remain supportive. Maintain a connection with him/her - even though they're spending most of their time with the church. They will change for the worse, becoming distant  because you're an outsider who isn't a "disciple" [church member]. You won't understand the insider lingo they use only with other group members and you won't "get" why they have to always be together, live together, and recruit the whole world. Don't express anything that would be perceived as judgmental, as it will make them even more distant. The objective is to keep yourself in their lives as much as possible, for 2 reasons:

Reason #1: When/if they finally get out of the ICOC or ICC, they will be able to transition easier. Leaving a cult is traumatic. Suicide is a risk, and deep depression, shame and hopelessness [among other PTSD -Post Trauma- symptoms]. They'll need all the support they can get.

Reason #2: Your true love for them will be there to contrast with the conditional love of the ICOC or ICC. 

Additional reason: If you lose connection, they'll fall deeper and deeper into the ICOC or ICC. The relationships in the church are all-consuming. This makes it hard, but do your best to stay in touch. Try to talk to your son or daughter as much as possible. This will help plant seeds of thought in their minds when communicated in a curious, non "threatening" way.

3. As just mentioned, be curious. Ask them "innocent" questions about the church, the process of how they got involved, what they believe. Ask about the church in a casual way. Get to know their new church roommates, friends, and church leaders. This won't get them out, but it will ease the tension and soften their guard. 

Examples:

"How was church today? What did the pastor preach about?"

"How is your roommate [name] doing?"

"How are your classes going? What have you been learning?" [This is important - have regular meaningful conversations about their life outside of the church - school, non-church friends, hobbies, family stuff, whatever. This won't get them out, but it will help ground them and decenter the ICOC or ICC in their lives and consciousness]. 

Another approach I don't recommend because it is very controversial. You can pretend to be interested in coming to church and studying the bible. The problem is that you know going in that you will never get baptized and become a member, so you would have to eventually bail out. This will cause a rift between you and your son or daughter, as they will feel grieved and disappointed that you rejected God [as they see it]. You can hopefully become "so and so's" mom or dad who hangs around the church regularly [if your son or daughter lives locally, that is]. I and my ICOC peers were close to certain moms of beloved members who were not "saved" or baptized with the ICOC but were part of the family due to their close relationship with their child. If you come to bible talks, church services, and don't study the bible, you might be fine. If there are no church members your age, no one will likely try and convert you. Just use this comfortable role to plant seeds of thought in your son or daughter and to retain close relational ties to at least allow for one foot to be in reality while the other foot is deep in the cult.

It's hard seeing this happen, especially when the church is negatively influencing their life decisions. The impact of this is devastating in some cases: they may fail out of school, end up being matched with another cult member and marrying them. They may drop out of school and go into the "ministry" part or full time. They might go on a mission planting in another part of the world. So many scenarios you don't want and can't stop. If you try, they'll separate from you and cling even stronger to the church, who doesn't have their best interests at heart. It's like watching someone sitting on train tracks with a train coming but you can't get them to move. 

It breaks my heart to tell you this, but your son or daughter is a legal adult and, just like any other decision they make, you have to let them learn and live with the consequences. The best you can do is support them in whatever way you can. 

Final Thoughts

Colleges and universities must be diligent in warning students about groups like the ICOC and ICC. Many colleges across the United States have banned the ICOC [not sure about the ICC] student groups from recruiting on campus. Educate yourself as much as you can about the ICOC, ICC and what cults are and how they operate. Also, try and find emotional support. You are going through this along with your child. It's traumatic. If you can find a support group for parents of cult victims or fundamental religion [more likely] that may be helpful. 

To further understand how the ICOC and ICC brainwash young people, read here.